Things to do before you get married
As I watch the years go by and deal with all those "married grown-up" issues, I sometimes look back on some things I wish I'd known or some things I wish I'd done before I settled down. So I came up with this list of "things to do before you settle down and get hitched" or simply "Bachelor Life: the list."
This list is serious and whimsical.
I encourage all of my bretheren to add to it. For the ladies: is there a Bachelorette version?
Here goes (in no uncertain order):
Earn your degrees: if you want to go to grad school or get that doctorate, do it while you're young. It is MUCH harder to go back after you're married with more responsibilities.
Two, Four or Six year bachelor pad: The four or six-year options are when you are in undergrad or grad school, but build up your dream bachelor pad. Get the black leather sofa and the ottoman that sits in front of the plasma screen. Get a pool table for the dining room. Put in it whatever you want, because once you get hitched, you're lucky if you get to design ONE room the way you want. Make it YOUR spot.
Diversify your dating: The best way to find out the type of woman you want is to get to know several — even at the same time. Women do this constantly. Date across the spectrum: Asian, Indian, Black, African, Carribean, South American, Middle Eastern, European. Some guys will always wonder. You will know. And ladies all over the globe dig on the bretheren (if you know what I mean). You don't even have to date, but make friends from all over the world. The knowledge you get about other cultures and places will be invaulable. Get a WORLD VIEW state of mind.
Visit a strip club: Now if you are very religious and this is not your cup of tea, don't go. Otherwise, this is the only place that you can unabashedly admire, observe, appreciate and drool over the female body. Note that we are not reducing all women to their bodies and ignoring their brains. Rather, at said gentlemen's clubs, the men want to observe and the dancers want your money. Appreciate that physically women's bodies are similar, but they are most certainly different. Have a guy's night out, visit the ATM and then hit the club with the fellas. Learn to appreciate the female form. Note: you can NOT do this at the office.
(If only once) Date a stripper: Is the myth really true? You may not have a stripper pole in your loft for her to dance on, but then again, she may not need it.
Fiscal responsibility (pt.1): Save at least $1,200 a year. That's $100 a month and a pretty low target. If you are gainfully employed and not in college, save more. After four years, you will have at least $4,800. You can take a quarter of that ($1,200) and invest it. NEVER spend this money. When you get back to $4,800, take a quarter again $1,200) and make this your emergency fund. Don't go into the kitty unless it is worth it, like buying a house. And unless the sig-other has her own funds to match or you just want to share it, this is YOUR money.
Fiscal responsibility (pt.2): Go easy on the credit cards. Very easy. Protect your credit rating by not jacking it up with high credit card balances. You'll thank yourself when you buy your first house.
International road trip: Get with your best friends, your road dogs and take a 1-2-week trip abroad. See the sights, dance with the local ladies, talk life and sports with the local guys and just soak in the food, culture, people and life with the guys who have your back. Years, decades later even, you'll all be able to look each other in the eye over a beer while your kids are playing and wives are talking and swear it was one of the best trips of your life.
Learn to cook: Trust me on this one: there are few things women find sexier than I guy who knows his way around the kitchen. Buy a cookbook each year and master at least 4-5 dishes. You know your boys won't turn down a free meal. So perfect the dishes and then when you've got it down, cook for a date. There's no such thing as a sure thing, but...
Learn to clean: Take the teeth out of a common misconception women have that we are all junky. Clean up after yourself and keep your place clean enough where Moms won't dog you out when she comes by on a surprise visit.
Mentor: As we all know, its hell out there for the young 'uns. Help be part of the solution by joining a mentoring or tutoring program. Show the young guys manhood is defined by knowedge, conviction and compassion. Not the latest gangasta rap.
Read at least 3 books a year: You can always read more, but at least pick one biography/autobiography of someone you respect. Pick a book/autobiography from someone in your field of work. Lastly, pick a book regarding something that interests you or something new you'd like to learn.
Anyone got others?
This list is serious and whimsical.
I encourage all of my bretheren to add to it. For the ladies: is there a Bachelorette version?
Here goes (in no uncertain order):
Earn your degrees: if you want to go to grad school or get that doctorate, do it while you're young. It is MUCH harder to go back after you're married with more responsibilities.
Two, Four or Six year bachelor pad: The four or six-year options are when you are in undergrad or grad school, but build up your dream bachelor pad. Get the black leather sofa and the ottoman that sits in front of the plasma screen. Get a pool table for the dining room. Put in it whatever you want, because once you get hitched, you're lucky if you get to design ONE room the way you want. Make it YOUR spot.
Diversify your dating: The best way to find out the type of woman you want is to get to know several — even at the same time. Women do this constantly. Date across the spectrum: Asian, Indian, Black, African, Carribean, South American, Middle Eastern, European. Some guys will always wonder. You will know. And ladies all over the globe dig on the bretheren (if you know what I mean). You don't even have to date, but make friends from all over the world. The knowledge you get about other cultures and places will be invaulable. Get a WORLD VIEW state of mind.
Visit a strip club: Now if you are very religious and this is not your cup of tea, don't go. Otherwise, this is the only place that you can unabashedly admire, observe, appreciate and drool over the female body. Note that we are not reducing all women to their bodies and ignoring their brains. Rather, at said gentlemen's clubs, the men want to observe and the dancers want your money. Appreciate that physically women's bodies are similar, but they are most certainly different. Have a guy's night out, visit the ATM and then hit the club with the fellas. Learn to appreciate the female form. Note: you can NOT do this at the office.
(If only once) Date a stripper: Is the myth really true? You may not have a stripper pole in your loft for her to dance on, but then again, she may not need it.
Fiscal responsibility (pt.1): Save at least $1,200 a year. That's $100 a month and a pretty low target. If you are gainfully employed and not in college, save more. After four years, you will have at least $4,800. You can take a quarter of that ($1,200) and invest it. NEVER spend this money. When you get back to $4,800, take a quarter again $1,200) and make this your emergency fund. Don't go into the kitty unless it is worth it, like buying a house. And unless the sig-other has her own funds to match or you just want to share it, this is YOUR money.
Fiscal responsibility (pt.2): Go easy on the credit cards. Very easy. Protect your credit rating by not jacking it up with high credit card balances. You'll thank yourself when you buy your first house.
International road trip: Get with your best friends, your road dogs and take a 1-2-week trip abroad. See the sights, dance with the local ladies, talk life and sports with the local guys and just soak in the food, culture, people and life with the guys who have your back. Years, decades later even, you'll all be able to look each other in the eye over a beer while your kids are playing and wives are talking and swear it was one of the best trips of your life.
Learn to cook: Trust me on this one: there are few things women find sexier than I guy who knows his way around the kitchen. Buy a cookbook each year and master at least 4-5 dishes. You know your boys won't turn down a free meal. So perfect the dishes and then when you've got it down, cook for a date. There's no such thing as a sure thing, but...
Learn to clean: Take the teeth out of a common misconception women have that we are all junky. Clean up after yourself and keep your place clean enough where Moms won't dog you out when she comes by on a surprise visit.
Mentor: As we all know, its hell out there for the young 'uns. Help be part of the solution by joining a mentoring or tutoring program. Show the young guys manhood is defined by knowedge, conviction and compassion. Not the latest gangasta rap.
Read at least 3 books a year: You can always read more, but at least pick one biography/autobiography of someone you respect. Pick a book/autobiography from someone in your field of work. Lastly, pick a book regarding something that interests you or something new you'd like to learn.
Anyone got others?
posted by DNastyOne at 8:47:00 AM
3 comments
